15 Nov 2005


So, you enter a nice romantic place, see a couple of lovers just simply dissolving in one another. Holding hands. In total embrace. Holding one another. Feeling one another breath. Total harmony. Floating spirits. Nonstop rivers of unspoken messages and feelings....... and on and on I can go. What is the first thing most people look for? A ring in either of their hands to make sure they are married, or engaged. Make sure they are acting under the legal shell. If the ring is on, then they must be seriously in love and he is not playing with her emotions, and she is not for his money or position. Simply not playing. If they are married, we immediately assume they are just a new couple. No way they would be married for too long.

We play judges.
We look for checkpoints.
We want everything to be as we know it.
We want things the way we do it.
We want everyone to have strong morals because this is the right way to do things.
Not sure if we are moralistic ourselves or just using morals and ethics to play safe and hide.


Blogger Alina said...

One more theory: maybe we're looking for the eternal "happy ending". Sure, they met some time ago, it was nice and new and love was in the air...Then is lasted, although they had problems, although they played a little with eachother, although others didn't support them...And now they're married, legally together, legally in love and now they'll think twice before ruining it!

I don't know why, but we still see marriage as a guarantee for love seen as a stable little warm place to turn to.

11/15/2005 10:13:00 am  
Blogger haal said...

What is 'Legal'? A piece of paper? There are lots of married couples who are not really married. Only having a paper makes them married? Is there something called married without having this paper? Too utopian. or maybe too naiive. Or maybe just too stupid to think this way, because........ we are not human. We are Animals and more important. We dont know who we are or What we want. See everyone as potential prey. And in case of marriage, a piece of paper is the weapon?!

I dont think we want love to be Eternal. We actually dont believe that. We dont even believe in love. We just want to see them in love for long time, but at the same time have hidden expectation, wish, desire that they fail. It will be just another proof that there is nothign called love. Love doesn't stand alone. Or even stand at all. It has to fail.

11/15/2005 10:32:00 am  
Blogger LouLou said...


'We' do all that only if we are not the couple. When we are in their place we act just like them & we think anyone who tries to judge or criticize us is just jealous.

11/15/2005 01:36:00 pm  
Blogger Alina said...

Lou, I agree, when you're it the perspective is changed.

Haal, I think we do believe in true, eternal love. We're just so sure it will not happen to us, it is proprietory of a small group of chosen ones. So we invented this piece of paper rule or religious weddings (in Romania, there are still people who think that if you haven't been married in a church, God does not see you as married, which sucks, cause God I think knows better than anyone what is for you) to keep us together.

Divorces are still seen as a plague, and no, we are not animals, because animals really don't care that much about what other people think.

11/15/2005 01:53:00 pm  
Blogger Al Sharief said...

Woaahh! Ya haal what kind of mood is that?!?

At any rate:
"Love doesn't stand alone. Or even stand at all. It has to fail." This could be half Right, but it does not have to fail!

I was told when I was a teenage: "There is nothing called Love" mostly refering to a boy- man / girl-women relationships. Brcause this kind of love never last, this person though. He also believed the Only love that exist is that from a mother to her children and the love of God, because this kind of love is eternal.

My take is that LOVE is a dynamic state. It peaks & falls. Up & dowen. One need to nourish it and work on it. Regardless of the piece of paper, One would need to work way harder to sustain a lovable loving living sharing caring marriage. You may remember that circle many moon ago.

You are Right "Love doesn't stand alone..." You can make it stand, but it takes TWO to dance.

It's Lovely Romantic whe Love dance.

11/15/2005 03:17:00 pm  
Blogger Sarah said...

Well Haal,
To tell you the truth I do know for a fact that anything out of the ordinary is criticized as hell by everyone else as if you are not allowed to do anything else, marriage is the only serious bond we know so if two people are that much in love what is stopping them.
Being in love is a complicated thing it kinda take your breath away and leave you spinning for quiet some time..
But after all WHO R WE TO JUDGE? We are just human beings we are not supposed to judge anything.. Who invited us to sit on that high presto and just call the shots?
Exactly nobody..

11/16/2005 08:47:00 am  
Blogger Zettes said...

Have any of you seen Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind?


I think it is a very interesting comment on love, happiness, and fate.

Thanks for the interesting discourse.

11/16/2005 11:51:00 pm  
Blogger haal said...

Popped up again, Zettes.. Where have you been, my friend?

Well, I saw the movie. Thought was very interesting. Didnt like it though. But still thought was very inteesting. Sad. I think life is just snapshots of things. The wise is that who can see the big picture. I am neither smart, nor seeing.

Can u reflect more. I really trully miss our discussions. No joke.

11/17/2005 02:56:00 pm  

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