A Message from within

This is her name. The silent girl or woman, I do not know, who I see passing by my door everyday. Silently she walks. Retreating in the way she says 'Good morning'. Alone in her world. Totally alone. No one knows who she is, or what she does. She sits in her own space. The library. A neglected place in our company that no one goes there. Hardly enter this room. She sits in there, no one know what she is doing. Just there. You know she is alive when you see her in the kitchen, bump to her in the elevator, smell her old perfume. Other than that, no one really cares about her. But the interesting part is that she seems to not care about anyone either. Kind, shy and super introvert as she might be, sad and insecure is what I see hidden inside. I personally see her shadow. Smile at her. Try to extend the rapid good morning, to 'How are you Abeer? Nice accessories.' To which she would give a fast bow with her body language, smile and then leave. She calls me 'Anaessa H....

A small fiery yet cute and kind. Popps up at the right moments. Yes, she is small but she is strong. Wise and very accurate. I love you. Admire you. Yes, your words said it all. What is for you will never go by you. Indeed right, Thanks, Haal

Wish that you dont worry about me. TO leave me and dont hold yourself responsible for me. Trust that you are home to me. I will always come back to you whenever I want. I dont get embaressed from you. On the contrary, I feel safe to do and say anything. I am just tired. Seriously tired. I want you to know where I am at so that I am free to do whatever I want. To even disappear if I feel like it. Disappear from you. Can I? But even that I cant do with you. I feel a continous need to be with you, connecting with you. This is a new feeling to me and thus hard. I dont want us to talk about that again, yet, dont want to talk about anything but this. It is the only time I feel so close to someone to that extent. Effortlessly. Feel safe and secured. I think I am tense because I shared a lot of who I am. Somthing I have been capturing all my life. I thought it would be the best gift in my life when time comes and I share it. But now with all the complications it is causing deep pain. Finding y...

I wasn't in the mood to even talk. I waited until it was time to go and then in a blink I was out. G., called, he had just arrived from Italy after a short christmas vacation. He wanted to meet for a coffee and sushi. Don't know. I didn't feel like talking or even eating. Sushi sounded too cold for the mood I was in, plus it was freezing that day. Well, for other reasons too sushi wasn't the best suggestion. It has memories with me. He called and asked me not to do Sushi, and wait for him till he is back. I said, 'Fine, you dont have to promise thought.' Promises now have no importance to me. Doesn't mean much. 'I promise'. Promise what? Next time I will make you sign a paper to make sure I get what you are saying the right way. Anyways, I went home then walked to Cilantro. Sat there and saw my cousin, Amiee. They say she looked like me. Then people started to pop in. I wasnt in the mood for any actually, not even for G. The usual gang appeared. I di...

This is not my state, but my friend's name, or what she liked to call her self on the cyber space. Stoned is my friend since, what, 15 years. Wow. That's a lot. Maybe not a lot for some but indeed a lot for me. Anyways, both of us happened to be in the same state of being recently. We didn't talk for quiet sometimes for various reasons, mainly because I was not in the mood to talk to anyone. She insisted to connect. Emailed. Smsed. Left messages. Sent songs. Everything. She wanted to talk. To tell me what's up with her, and to know what's up with me. As if she knows. Knows that we both need to share. Yes, A. it was great sharing with you. I never talked personal to anyone. Not on my personal stuff. Not even A. Hardly do I do that. Well, on that day, when I was going mad, she smsed me at the same exact moment that I needed to scream. I immediately called her. she was shocked. It had been months since she has been trying to connect and I denied her. I heard her voice...