A Message from within

And I thought I am stubborn. Good news is: I am not that stubborn. Bad news is: Someone is. The result is I found myself whenever presenting any idea I have to negotiate my way through. It is always 'refused' and I go on trying to convince. And I end up not convincing partly because I get very uncomfortable and give up. In other cases, I found myself working through a very strict, thin, specific requirements that suffocate me. What do I do? I let go.

Not sure why would I waste sometime write about him. I am not sure. Maybe because he is interesting. Maybe because he annoys me and provoke the sarcasm part of me wanting to pick on him everytime he comes in to do his Bullshit acts. Not sure. But indeed because I just have some time to waste and getting it out maybe help me advance towards my 2009 resolution faster. I dont know :) Failing to see the good side of him. I JUDGE him as a bluff. Total bluffer. Which is actually ok to be a bluffer. These are the people who make it high. Is that TRUE? GOD no. Not really. Well, my issue with him is that I dont trust him. Is that my issue? Well, ehm... it is that I do not trust him AND dont respect him AND ....hehe it shows. How can I hide? I do not. I even say it and it is reflected in every gesture of me. I do not deny it. I am not convinced of him on most.... most? well, ALL levels. Are you that of a black and white person? No no no.. dont get me wrong.... he (cross my heart and hands and le...

It has been so long. Absolutely so long. Since? Since you wrote of course. Well not exactly did I mean that. No. It has been so long since I connected with it. This is what I meant. Even at the very time of 'angryness' or disappointements I just accept to believe someone outside. To accept as a sign of something. Whatever this something I know it is fake. But as if that everytime this happens, I smile. In realization that unless you gain it inside, everyome will bypass and invade. Invade to erode not to erect. And this is a reality of realization. Or maybe the realization of reality. No matter what they say, it is this scenario that will happen. The more space you allow, the more forward they will proceed.