29 Dec 2006

THINGS

I do not like to be:
  1. Misunderstood
  2. Judged as a changing, unstable character
  3. Jealous
  4. My actions and reaction judged and assessed
  5. Under continus survelliance
  6. Justify and explain myself
  7. Talk about what I feel or how someone should do. Reveal my expectation
  8. Disappoint and not meet the expectation i put on myself towards the other or the other's expectation in me
  9. Feel imprisoned, either emotionally or physically or reaction wise
  10. Vaguness and ambiguity
  11. Mistrust and have my suspicions triggered. I am detective by nature. Know what's happening but prefer others to tell me
  12. Feel unappreciated or criticized internally
  13. Silent criticizim. Hiding what you feel or what you think of things or what you think of me
  14. I want to know everything, every thought, however, i dont have to do the same
  15. Feel things are unshared, but again, I dont have to share everything. I do not do this intentionally, just I dont feel like doing so
  16. Dont like to be predictable. All my reactions and actions known. Yet, I want to predict my partners. I do that, yet again, I want him to give me different reactions to make things more exciting. I push for reactions, different ones.
  17. Comparisons. To be compared against. I like to compare and compete with myself against unknown, but I hate to reveal that I am doing that
  18. Lose control of myself and my emotions. It is boring to the other side
  19. Say everything I am thinking of. Reveal all my plans and my thinking process
  20. To be taken for granted
  21. To cry and show that I love you so much.
  22. To say what I do not mean just to get any strong reaction
  23. To have to ask for love and security. I want to always have that all the time for granted
  24. Not be shown appreciation. Take no response. No reaction. No intensity. All that kills me. Make me whirl. I want to see the impact of everything i do. An immediate impact
  25. Conservative and reserved and secretive partner. Want an open, spontanoeus, yet conservative, planner and deep partner

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